SMack!

Journey Into Electric Darkness (2/2)
by voltsjolts

This was the point where it became a true twisted obsession even at such a young age. I was addicted to this exact type of anal pain and nothing else would turn me on. I didn't even learn how to masturbate prior to playing with electricity and now I was so jaded there was no possibility of pleasuring myself without it. Enough background on getting started, here comes the extreme part. This is the kind of self-bondage scene I was into less than a year after starting down this path:

I would start by hot-melt gluing a 1 1/2 inch diameter, 6-inch long dual-contact electrode into my ass so it wouldn't fall out when I thrashed around. Hot melt glue wont stick to the inside smooth skin of the rectum but it will stick to the outer butt cheeks. There was no hair in that region yet but if there was it would have pulled off by all the glue for sure. The burning of the melted glue against my skin was just a teaser for all the glorious pain about to come. The glue kept it in there pretty good but not enough to prevent removal so there was also a harness of metal cable threaded through a hole in the end of the probe and secured with a lock. The power source was very advanced now. It had a delayed start timer, measured shock duration timer, and automatic power level increase timer. It sat 6 feet away from the bed and locked into a desk drawer. The heavy power cable was taken from a thick outdoor extension cord and ran out and over to the bed and around a bed post several times to prevent any pulling from removing it from the shock source. From there it ran up onto the bed and into the probe in my ass. It was tied to the metal cable harness very well to prevent being pulled out of the probe. My feet were tied spread eagle to the bed posts, almost touching them with just about a foot of slack. There was another restraint tied to my wrist using a combination lock and connected to a rope pulling my arm tight over my head to just short of the headboard stretching my body out tight in the center of the bed. The other hand was left free to masturbate but there was no way using all of possible strength it could ever remove the electrode or undo any restraints.

The room was pitch dark but there was a light on a regular wall timer set to turn on just after the session was completed. Once that combination lock on my hand was closed there was absolutely no return because it was too dark to see the dial on the lock. Sometimes there was a second or two of hesitation but I never failed to click that lock shut and seal my fate for the next hour.

It was an unbelievable feeling just waiting there in the dark anticipating what was about to happen. Adrenaline pumping in my veins and my heart beating fast. Counting out the seconds and listening to the muffled sound of timers ticking away in the drawer wondering when it would start. Questions dancing in my mind like how long until the power level built up to causing serious pain and exactly how much pain was going to result this time when the resistor reached zero and let the full unrestricted shock flood into my soon-to-be-tortured anus? Did the timers get set right and what if the off switch didn't work this time?

When the shock started it was always just a small tickle at first but the sexual excitement was undeniable. After about 6 minutes it went from tickle to slight pain and it was time to masturbate. The charge slowly increased and the feeling was pure pleasure so strong there was a ringing in my ears. It was a carefully timed sort of masturbation. If the orgasm came too fast then the full effect of the shock would be wasted but if it took too long then the pain level would get so high it would stop the pleasure dead in its tracks. After the orgasm hit me and started to fade, the shock-induced pleasure that was my friend would turn against me and become all pain without pleasure. Still, the timer on the resistor ticked down, slowly but monotonously turning up the voltage bit by bit with the occasional small jump as the resistor stuck a bit as it rotated. Just a few minutes more and it hurt so bad my body twisted around in bed straining at the restraints in vain. It was no fun now, why did I do this to myself? … and it was too late to ask. My mind racing over escape plans but there was nothing. Sometimes I would claw at the electrode and try to pull it loose. It was no use, the restraints were just too thorough. There was no way to stop this inevitable process of pain. My whole ass was on fire now, muscles clenching, agony ripping through my rectum. A homemade gag made out of a t-shirt and locked into my mouth with a metal cable prevented screaming out loud. I could breath through the gag a bit but would end up panting through my nostrils as fast as possible because of the pain. Still the level of shock increased and now the pain seemed to extend out from my rectum into my whole pelvis. Maybe it took my breath away so much it would not have been possible to scream even without the gag because I was truly gasping for air as quickly as possible just to survive. There wasn't even a stray thought to any further masturbation at this point, it was just about pain and survival now. There never was any p
ermanent damage done but in the heat of the moment there was always a fear that this was the one time I had finally gone too far and the current was surely permanently burning through the tissue my rectum. There was no way of knowing how much time was left or if the power was all the way up yet. A person can't even begin to keep track of time when crazed senseless with so much pain. It just went on and on like that for about 40 more minutes while I cried continuous silent tears, arching my back and sometimes convulsed helplessly knowing there was absolutely no escape from pain until the timer ran out.

That was the exact mental feeling I grew addicted to, being helpless in pain from my own actions. My feindish inventiveness had perfected a way of achieving it all on my own at any time. When the shock timer finally finished ticking down it would turn off the shock and my body collapsed like a rag doll. Maybe a minute or two later the light timer activated and lit the room. I felt weak and it was hard to open the lock with the pain still so strong my fingers would be shaking and making mistakes while trying to dial the combination. I would look down and see my whole body dripping with sweat so much it had soaked an outline of itself into the sheet. It was important to keep water handy and not get dehydrated before starting the next round of pain. In a weird way I was proud of being able to do this thing to my body like it was some achievment worthy of praise but also so embarrassing it was impossible to share with any other person. Sleep never mattered to me. When I got the craving, sometimes I would repeat the whole process three times in a single night. Once I had my fill I would undo all of the restraints and remove the electrode. The glue would tear off a bit of skin and the internal probe was always hot to the touch and shining with my sweat. Even after a full night agonizing pain and exhaustion just the mere sight of that electrode, my chosen master, still turned me on. One last step, everything had to be disassembled and hidden in various places to prevent my parents from discovering my implements of pain.

I had this unreachable fantasy of going further and forcing myself to take it in one big dose until I lost consciousness. I got aroused just picturing myself laying unconscious on the bed in a cold sweat but still jerking around from the shocks. I never did find a way to reach that point on my own.

Eventually, I realized that this insane path of ever increasing risk and pain was leading to something permanent and bad. My will to survive is strong, so I simply quit cold-turkey and pushed it all deep into the back of my mind. The desire is still there but I blend in perfectly now, just another boring vanilla member of the masses.

-voltsjolts